A question for CD's, from a friend of CJ's...
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Terri(SO)
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Lydia
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Stephanie W
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CJ
Gee, thanks for throwing in those additional 'mindbenders'.
As if this discussion wasn't already getting complicated! Just kidding! Those examples you mentioned are certainly worthy of inclusion in your 'fact-finding' exercise. Like those who see us as gay, I would bet those same folks would just as quickly tell you that any male attracted to M-F transperson is also gay, gay gay! Short and simple! If only they knew. If only we knew? Or does it even matter? I'd be interested in your final conclusions and whether Carole agrees or not. Don't think I'll be surprised if she has even more questions.
Stephanie
Gee, thanks for throwing in those additional 'mindbenders'.
As if this discussion wasn't already getting complicated! Just kidding! Those examples you mentioned are certainly worthy of inclusion in your 'fact-finding' exercise. Like those who see us as gay, I would bet those same folks would just as quickly tell you that any male attracted to M-F transperson is also gay, gay gay! Short and simple! If only they knew. If only we knew? Or does it even matter? I'd be interested in your final conclusions and whether Carole agrees or not. Don't think I'll be surprised if she has even more questions.Stephanie
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Sally
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a question for CD's..from a friend of CJ's
Hi CJ,
It’s an interesting thought about the heterosexual, single-gendered, biological male who's sexually attracted to a MtF transperson, is he really a HS-GBM?. Being who and what I am, maybe I'm somewhat different to a HS-GBM, but it’s something which I’ve pondered about more than once.
I know a number of TS’s who have completed their transition and now live and identify as women, and indeed have all their documentation re-newed to show female status. Things such as birth certificate, drivers licence, banking records etc all now show their sex as F. Some of these women are extremely attractive and certainly attract the interest of males, and indeed they actively seek male company.
My point in this is that as for myself, they hold no sexual attraction, I don’t look at them in ‘that’ way, the same way which I do with a genetic female, they are purely and simply just good friends. It may possibly be because I know their background and as I’ve always only ever been attracted to genetic women, that knowledge of their history doesn’t allow me to ‘light my lamp’ over them.
I don’t dwell on it myself because it all can get far too confusing and does it really matter? well maybe to some it does, and maybe to people who are not of our ilk it matters more. The make up of a human being is so complex, and each of us is similar, maybe even identical in some ways, yet so vastly different in many other ways. We could drive ourselves silly trying to find answers, because I believe there isn’t always an answer to be found, some things just are, and at this stage in our evolution science hasn’t unlocked the answers to so many things.
No doubt one day someone will be able to discover definite evidence which will tell us beyond all shadow of doubt as to why someone like me can be born with all the visible characteristics of a male, yet the brain only thinks female to the point where to be able to survive and live a reasonable life I have to live as a female, yet still have that male side which is only attracted to genetic females. It probably won’t happen in my lifetime, so one thing I do try to accomplish is try to help educate members of the community who are willing to learn about the diversity nature creates in animals and plants, particularly in human beings, and that diversity is nothing to be feared in the case of people such as myself. It can be a daunting task at times, but very rewarding for both parties also in many cases.
To me at this stage of my life it’s important to try and make the path for those coming behind me easier than I had it, and the only way I can see that we’ll ever become ‘ordinary members of society’ is through education of the young, so that they grow up accepting that we exist, and the way we are is just normal for us and we’re no threat. With any major change to ingrained culture it usually takes 2 to 3 generations to erase the past thinking, but as always, changes have to start somewhere, and although over the last 30 years we have made ground, it’s still only in the infant stage, but it is happening.
Kind Regards,
Sally.
It’s an interesting thought about the heterosexual, single-gendered, biological male who's sexually attracted to a MtF transperson, is he really a HS-GBM?. Being who and what I am, maybe I'm somewhat different to a HS-GBM, but it’s something which I’ve pondered about more than once.
I know a number of TS’s who have completed their transition and now live and identify as women, and indeed have all their documentation re-newed to show female status. Things such as birth certificate, drivers licence, banking records etc all now show their sex as F. Some of these women are extremely attractive and certainly attract the interest of males, and indeed they actively seek male company.
My point in this is that as for myself, they hold no sexual attraction, I don’t look at them in ‘that’ way, the same way which I do with a genetic female, they are purely and simply just good friends. It may possibly be because I know their background and as I’ve always only ever been attracted to genetic women, that knowledge of their history doesn’t allow me to ‘light my lamp’ over them.
I don’t dwell on it myself because it all can get far too confusing and does it really matter? well maybe to some it does, and maybe to people who are not of our ilk it matters more. The make up of a human being is so complex, and each of us is similar, maybe even identical in some ways, yet so vastly different in many other ways. We could drive ourselves silly trying to find answers, because I believe there isn’t always an answer to be found, some things just are, and at this stage in our evolution science hasn’t unlocked the answers to so many things.
No doubt one day someone will be able to discover definite evidence which will tell us beyond all shadow of doubt as to why someone like me can be born with all the visible characteristics of a male, yet the brain only thinks female to the point where to be able to survive and live a reasonable life I have to live as a female, yet still have that male side which is only attracted to genetic females. It probably won’t happen in my lifetime, so one thing I do try to accomplish is try to help educate members of the community who are willing to learn about the diversity nature creates in animals and plants, particularly in human beings, and that diversity is nothing to be feared in the case of people such as myself. It can be a daunting task at times, but very rewarding for both parties also in many cases.
To me at this stage of my life it’s important to try and make the path for those coming behind me easier than I had it, and the only way I can see that we’ll ever become ‘ordinary members of society’ is through education of the young, so that they grow up accepting that we exist, and the way we are is just normal for us and we’re no threat. With any major change to ingrained culture it usually takes 2 to 3 generations to erase the past thinking, but as always, changes have to start somewhere, and although over the last 30 years we have made ground, it’s still only in the infant stage, but it is happening.
Kind Regards,
Sally.
Watch nature, because it’s our greatest teacher, it moves and flows and moves on again. We can never be free until we disengage, so allow life to flow as you find it. The way it is, is the way it is.
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Virginia
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Terri brings yet another BIG factor into the mix! Relationships! Very few if any "couples" unite on the first contact! That is they see each other "from across the room" and bond! It does happen, but very infrequently. I would be curious to know the number of GG's that leave a relationship permanently after discovering that their "soul mate" is a crossdresser? Of course that would lead to trying to discover how many GG's in finding that out end up staying in the relationship and for what reasons? Having read several relative comments by GG's about that over the years, here on this forum, it appears that in some cases the GG finds this "gift" that her SO has is actually really a gift that improves their relationship, while others just tolerate it for whatever reason.
Most of us in "heterosexual" relationships (from a male perspective) can only guess at why our chosen companion remains with us once they become aware of our "gift." Then we get into "bounderies" and the complications that arises just between GG's and males, when you toss in "another woman" so to speak - WOW! the love of the "inner person" as Terri eludes to can really get complicated.
How about we all meet back here in 2075 and see what science and psychology has done to/for us?!!!!
Love you all,
Virginia
Most of us in "heterosexual" relationships (from a male perspective) can only guess at why our chosen companion remains with us once they become aware of our "gift." Then we get into "bounderies" and the complications that arises just between GG's and males, when you toss in "another woman" so to speak - WOW! the love of the "inner person" as Terri eludes to can really get complicated.
How about we all meet back here in 2075 and see what science and psychology has done to/for us?!!!!
Love you all,
Virginia
First star to the right, then straight on 'till mornin!