Crossdressers-Haven.com

I've thought long and hard on this topic and now I'm sure. My uncle on my father's side was a homosexual cross dresser, my aunt on my mother's side was a lesbian, then there is me, now my great grandson is wanting to dress. There is some doubt about my father and his other brother. How can you argue with the evidence? It is genetic!

THIS WAS SUPPOSE TO GO IN THE GENETICS THREAD! I HAD A BRAIN CRAMP



Genetics probably play a role in all of this and us. Be one homosexual, bisexual, heterosexual, transgendered, crossdresser and a host of other human traits and idiosyncrasy. External influences and forces probably filter, shape and colour these genetic traits. I do not think it's all ONE or the OTHER.

For myself my desire to feel my feminine side and notably through crossdressing goes back to oh as early as I can recall, maybe age 5. I vividly remember, seeing neighbourhood girls, my sister and my mother dressing in girls/womens clothes and being so feminine, girly or womanly. At age 5 one does not understand this but I so wanted to wear the clothes and at times be very girly. Like it was yesterday I was again about 5 and remember a girl up the block from our house, Dianna who was (A snapshot or short mental video is burned in my mind even to today) wearing a white turtleneck top, royal blue short jumper, white tights and black patent mary-jane shoes... I SO WANTED TO WEAR IT ALL AS SHE LOOKED! Even in my mind today I am propelled back to age 5 and wish it was me and not her dressed as such. AGE FREAKING FIVE! how much or little life experience could have caused me to want to and to today remember it like it was yesterday? No, a part of my character is wired to be and feel a need to dress feminine and let my feminine feelings flow. Another is nurture/life.

Did my upbringing in household culture help shape this base point? Probably. I have a powerful and often kodachrome like memory. I can recall say one day being age 5-6 in the bathroom with my dad as he shaved with his electric shaver and I'd take the plastic cover to his shaver and hop up on the counter and with him looking in the mirror an I'd copy him shaving. Then another day I recall my mother dressing up even though she ALWAYS dressed beautifully as a woman and my sister and I watching her touch up her hair and putting on her lipstick while looking in the mirror and we'd as kids bug her to put lipstick on us. YES as a little boy mom would play and let me get a little lip of her lipstick along with my sister too. Of course it would probably have been licked and wiped off my lips quickly. Did that turn me into a cder? NO! because I liked girl clothes and stuff before this sort of play with my mother.

I recall from age oh 5-6-7-8 playing barbies with my sister, it was fun. It never really crossed my mind that it was oh no, he's gonna be a homo type 'bad' for a boy to do such? Why? because the next hour or day I would then be playing with my bucket of soldiers, hot wheels or match box cars. Or maybe drawing airplanes on paper or playing table hockey with my older brother etc. Hell I even played tea party with my sister and her neighbourhood girl friends, SO WHAT? because I could then later play street hockey with the other boys or we'd be messin about getting dirty another day.

I recall dressing up in my mother's clothes by age 10-11. By that age often we'd , my sister and I would be at home alone as our older brother would baby sit but not harrang us. So at times my sister and I would put on her pantyhose and maybe skirt, we'd try on her shoes, they still fit me back then. It was harmless child fun, but loved it. By age 13-14 though and puberty hitting me I stopped doing such with my sister. But if I was home alone I'd often get into my mother's clothes, pantyhose, a dress or a blouse and skirt and I could still get my feet into some of her shoes, open toed sandals or her slides. My favorite pair she had was a stunning pair of blue suede platform sandals with oh a 4.5-5inch platform wedge heel. I'd be in either my blue jeans or maybe one of my mom's skirts over pantyhose and clasp the straps up. I'd then easily walk around in these delicious for a cding 13-14-15 y.o. boy and look in a full length mirror at how good my body and legs looked in such tall heels. Yes, being in puberty I also learned about masturbation and I'd often masturbate doing this WISHING I WAS A CUTE SCHOOL GIRL! After I'd ejaculate I FELT LIKE CRAP! I as an immature 13-14-15 y.o. would ask, WHAT THE F*K WAS WRONG WITH ME?! We had no Google or internet stuff back then so I could not answer that question except for feeling sick as a teenage boy after doing such. I'd often then over compensate being a teenage boy to cover these feeling too.

Dating in H.S. was not a heavy thing for me, but I loved being with the girls I dated and in puppy dog love. My hormonal boy feelings were there but so to were my feminine and cding feelings. I'd often fantasize about the clothes my H.S. GF's would wear.

Anyways, I feel much of this cding and more tging stuff for many of us here has genetics as a part of it, but also shaped by life around us and people who we share life with. I could see in life, on t.v. in movies or in magazines beautiful women as I grew up and well wonder about or desire to be with them as a teen boy and young man well even today , but I also would want/dream about to wear the clothes, shoes, boots or put on their makeup and do hair as I saw It was so confusing but so exciting.

I could go on here but I blathered on too long already. IMO IT'S ALL COMBINATIONS OF GENETICS AND UPBRINGING/NURTURE/CULTURE/LIFE EXPERIENCES!

After I came out to my sister, she told me that we have a family history of this. So I believe genetics has a lot to do with this.

My dad is a CD, he thinks his dad may have been, and he has an uncle that was. I also have a cousin that is a semi pro drag queen. So I believe it is genetic.

Perhaps it's more ubiquitious than genetic?

If possible due to my brain cramp, when originally posting could we merge this thread into the Genetics thread. If so it would simplify our discussions here.

After I came out to my mom, she told me that my dad was a closeted dresser.

Quite possibly, there is a DNA code for cross dressing, trans, or gay. The problem with identifying this gene is then parents might want to abort a child. I'll go along with accepting genetics as a cause and care less about finding the genome.
I do agree that some families have more 'alternative' offspring than others.

Eileen

Looking there does seem to be some data supporting this. I prefer actual research, think these articles were. For our family there was a picture of an uncle with his wife's nightgown on...but he always fancied his self a joke'ster and his wife openly ensured that was all there was to it with a laugh.... one time I saw a black teddy type piece of lingerie in one of the drawers in my parent's bathroom on my father's side of the vanity but I really doubt it....who knows. So...I really only know about my self though my older son went through a goth stage and I saw a picture of him in black femm make up and clothes...he's now married with two kids...guess he wasn't gay aftetall...I thought not but had to wait and now he's about to graduate the fire academy. The other son came home with his eyebrows done...not thinned...some girl was playing I think. No, and my half brother never showed any signs of this...nope just me...and I'm all over it for our family.

Sounds as if we all share a common experience with all of this very similar. The base is at some point our feminine desires came and we pursued them with delight enjoying it all immensely because our femininity was already there...just needed our awakening or realization of it within ourselves.

Anne,

Yes, I agree... I never asked to be a crossdresser and one who as years passed by became more and more enamored by dressing and being fully femme. Even if I take the clothes and face off later and go back to my regular dude's life.

Feelings of being feminine and dressing feminine have been a part of me as far as I can recall. Life with it's experiences and evolving society only hardened my feminine and crossdressing side. More so over the last oh 10-15 years as one begins to accept more and more who they are and stop feeling the guilt that social pressure can lay on you. My cding is very private and at times I wish I was more open but my cding is simply me celebrating my feminine side trying not to feel guilt or shame and and love of just being Lacey.


*** Post edited to remove redundant quote, as per: http://crossdressers-haven.com/forums/v ... 65&t=10059" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; - SL

Yes, I agree. I do not consider myself closeted I can recall driving wearing a skirt and pumps but changed for gas or stops. I have been out fully dressed and have driven around. and even went to Walmart Neighborhood Market a couple times but jeans.... I have told a lot of people, and have been dressed around many of them but I do not feel any need carry Anne out into public. I have no doubt that I would have no problem going to visit a friend dressed but that is a hypothetical situation.

Yeah, mainly I have femininity within me and when these feeling become stronger I do dress at home and carry on. As I have said elsewhere a lifetime of being firmly pushed along the male path with all the expectations and the pressures have not effected my femininity and I have and always will be as I am. I think any woman would just have to take this part of who I am as nothing more than a matter of fact about me. Why should it be anything negative? Many have found who I am as being very positive I am not like other men our communication our relationships are improved. I am not effeminate or flamboyant in any way but I am different than what they are used to or have come to expect from men, and they find it to be a positive thing.

Hi sisters,

I have a suspicion my father may have been a crossdresser. There were some oddly largish dresses in the attic my mother certainly never wore ... But they are gone and I've no way to find out now.

I do know that an uncle and aunt of mine wholly reversed gender work roles. She was the breadwinner (a county librarian), he stayed home and did the housework in an apron (though he didn't dress the part otherwise). In all their long marriage that pattern persisted. People smiled about it, wondered how it worked; but the two of them never minded, they were happy that way.

Love, Marissa Mae

I have read many articles and studies on both sides of the existence of the "Gay" or "TG" gene and to be honest neither side has presented a valid enough argument to sway me in either direction.

I am not a geneticist not profess to be but wouldn't it seem if there were such a gene wouldn't it be more prevalent in society? IMO if it does lie in genetics and I am not saying it does or doesn't, it is more of a combination of genes coupled with other influences. Being TG and having questioned "Why me?" many times as I am sure every other TG has yes I would love to have that answer. However I believe there are more pressing issues such as the cute for cancer, etc.

Eileen (SO) wrote:The problem with identifying this gene is then parents might want to abort a child.

Eileen

That already occurs not because of the child being TG but for other medical reasons.

There is much debate within the medical and scientific community as to the existence of the "Gay" or "TG" gene. I have read much on this subject and there are valid arguments both ways. Still until it is proved it remains theory. I tend to agree with Diana with being a multitude of factors and certain genetic combinations is one potential factor and I lean in that direction as well. How else would explain one sibling being TG or Gay for that matter yet the rest are heterosexual "straight" individuals? Yes there have been some families where it appears to be more common yet in other cases there is no record or even family myths about anything like that. It definitely needs further and broader studies before a reasonable hypothesis can be put forth IMO.

Eileen (SO) wrote:I do agree that some families have more 'alternative' offspring than others.

Eileen

Or some families have larger closets.