Crossdressers-Haven.com

last month I was in denial and was kind of tired of fighting the bulk on the back of my head and neck...I was headed in a guy direction and feeling it would help went at it with my clippers...ugh! Then went to my old barber shop...they do have lady barbers and do do women's hair still with guys it's guy cuts. I had been going to Regis but felt he was not very good at achieving quite what I desired, though my wife always looked great after she had seen him...

I was lucky to get one of the ladies, she remembered me...been a while ... told her I had let it go long but tried to trim it myself and now needed help to fix it. So...as she talked...she kept clipping and she'd talk and clip some more...."you cut into some of the hair line, I will have to cut it a little short then come back next month and I won't cut it it will just be for a trim." I thanked her, paid and tipped her and went home. In the mirror I realized she had it very neat and nice but had also trimmed it down until dang my hair was probably a 1/2" in length in places, tapered in back too...It looked as if my hair had been drawn onto my head with a magic marker!

Well as the days slipped by, my girl side began to get angry with me and rightfully so...It will take months for my hair to grow to the same length it is in my avitar which I think....is really a very nice compromise length for me....Long enough to style feminine, short enough so people do not think it is too long for a guy for any occasion. Being gender fluid, what more could I ask.

Well...it has been 27 days since and I have been taking Hair, Skin, and Nail vitamins so while I have a long way to go probably about 4-5 months before I am happy again, many women are around who do have hair this short. That is encouraging. I do not have a feminine head shape...but it purks up with the right shampoo and conditioner, and with a central part my bangs are there...with make up and ear rings...I do look feminine or more like a woman so...I guess I am saying if your hair is very short and you do not like wigs, don't despair you can still achieve a feminine look.

How long is too long for a guy, Anne? My hair, when not tied back, falls to just about halfway between my shoulder and my shirt pocket. In back it's a little longer. I am , like you, out to the people who are important to me, but not to anyone else. The fact that I don't share my gender position with the general public doesn't mean that I have any desire to to prove to them that I am conservative or respectable or conventional in any way. #1 I'm not. #2 it's none of their business.

I will tell you this, since I grew out my hair, my tips, in my part time job as a shared van driver, have gone up significantly. Apparently, it pays to be yourself.

Well...thing is I have lived a life and have projected the expected image. My kind of man wears a regular man's hair cut, and no they do not have pierced ears. Problem is it becomes so ingrained in your head. When I was a kid on up to college...My parents heavily influenced and so even in the late 60's and 70's when many of the boys in school were wearing long hair...I looked like I was in the military...no not shaved to brills but white walls over the ears, tapered up the back and enough to comb over in the front to a shaggy length...

Oh well we are now into 2 months, 9 days since the haircut I do not plan to make that mistake again because my gender is most definitely expansive, has been and always will be. I will return to Regis in a few months.

I usually trim my hair at least twice during the summer. This year I said the heck with it I am letting it grow. The back is almost to my shoulders. I am going to let it grow.

Kymmie

2.5 months since I made the mistake...I keep trying to deny because I have been forced to live and to meet expectations others placed on me while inside I have always been here. But never again. I may have my hair trimmed to 3 months or perhaps 4 months growth but I will never again have my head shaved and clipped back as it was this last time because I am not a man on the inside but someone who has a more feminine frame of mind every day If I had to place a percentage as requested by the psychologist, and I have done this in my head before...I told him I am somewhere between 60% male to 40% female and 50/50, perhaps 55% male to 45% female. I am male, some of gender is biological and fixed, some reinforced by socialization, expectations etc...have written about this over and over again...thing is I was forced to project masculine male and was forced by society to project and to meet all of those expectations or be shunned, and heavily penalized throughout my life for being anything but that. We are brainwashed and that is very difficult to overcome. Small wonder I tend to deny and do things like this.

All I have to do is look back to all of my episodes of dressing and desire to be allowed to be a girl from childhood through today...deny that! So...I believe the avitar photo is a good baseline length if I desire a shorter length but because I am a girl in good part I should never go shorter than that ever again.