World shift
Posted: Sun Dec 22, 2013 10:58 am
I have recently been fortunate enough to get into a relationship with a woman that I love very much! Having been on my own for 5 years, I have been struggling with the notion of being TS and getting into a serious relationship again. Things have been moving so fast for me - especially over the last few years that to be honest I couldn't imagine anybody would be interested.
Anyway - one thing I did decide was that I would be upfront with others when it came to telling them about Ginny. I have heard too many heart breaking tales about coming out once in a relationship to want to take that route.
About 6 months ago I came out to a work colleague. Gaynor has been immensely suportive - even down to lending me clothes and doing my hair! As time has gone on, the relationship has deepened and we're now an item (YAYYYY!).
We had the obvious conversation yesterday about how we are both seeing the future of this relationship and she surprised the hell out of me! I began by saying that whilst I certainly have the urge to transition, I wouldn't do that if I was in a relationship with her. She had a drastically different vision ... she told me that she fully expected me to be living full time by the time I retire (about 4 years time) and that in terms of hormones and surgery, her priority was that I get to really express who I am - and that might well involve transition later - And she wants to spend the rest of her life with me! I can't begin to tell you how that felt! I am so lucky!
Anyway - it's early days, but I have to say that I feel as if the world has shifted! I am so lucky!
We are all in different positions and so I would never criticise anybody for being frightened of coming out. Life is so complicated and acceptance is quite a different deal in different parts of the world and in different families! From this place however, I have to say that starting as you mean to go on is really worth the risk as it seems to me that we can never really feel loved by someone if we are wearing a mask.
Anyhoo - just wanted to share some of this with you all.
Keep your chin up!
Hugs Ginny xxx
Anyway - one thing I did decide was that I would be upfront with others when it came to telling them about Ginny. I have heard too many heart breaking tales about coming out once in a relationship to want to take that route.
About 6 months ago I came out to a work colleague. Gaynor has been immensely suportive - even down to lending me clothes and doing my hair! As time has gone on, the relationship has deepened and we're now an item (YAYYYY!).
We had the obvious conversation yesterday about how we are both seeing the future of this relationship and she surprised the hell out of me! I began by saying that whilst I certainly have the urge to transition, I wouldn't do that if I was in a relationship with her. She had a drastically different vision ... she told me that she fully expected me to be living full time by the time I retire (about 4 years time) and that in terms of hormones and surgery, her priority was that I get to really express who I am - and that might well involve transition later - And she wants to spend the rest of her life with me! I can't begin to tell you how that felt! I am so lucky!
Anyway - it's early days, but I have to say that I feel as if the world has shifted! I am so lucky!
We are all in different positions and so I would never criticise anybody for being frightened of coming out. Life is so complicated and acceptance is quite a different deal in different parts of the world and in different families! From this place however, I have to say that starting as you mean to go on is really worth the risk as it seems to me that we can never really feel loved by someone if we are wearing a mask.
Anyhoo - just wanted to share some of this with you all.
Keep your chin up!
Hugs Ginny xxx
