Accepting or not accepting your partner's CDing

Post by **DonnaT** » Mon Jan 31, 2005 12:40 pm

I said accepting, even though it isn't 100%, which is probably hard to get from most wives.

I said accepting because my wife says she wants me to be happy, even though she sets limits, which I am always trying to change.

I wear something fem every day, and even to bed. Even though she may not be happy with this, she accepts that I have this need to do so, and she will not try to change that.

Virginia · Post by **Virginia** » Mon Jan 31, 2005 12:58 pm

Cd'ing is such a (dare I say) "strange concept" to a lot of SO's and I guess to us as well. Since I "came out" to my wife, as a lot of you know, in almost a year and a half, it has been a "roller coaster" ride. She did not accept it and "outted" me to everyone in the family, then she did accept it, then we went to counselling and SHE suggested that I go to SCC (which I did and it was wonderful, but I digress) she set one limit, "she did not want to meet Virginia." I abide by that everyday. Now she wants and we are negotiationg a divorce. Solely because I am a CD'er??? I do not know as she can not seem to give me a straight answer. Her brain surgery back in December and my doting on her every need helped then she "regressed" to not accepting Virginia and on and on and on to the point where I have said "screw it" I refuse to live under this constant insenuation that I am some kind of sociopathic pervert! Her latest comment was, "I can't agrue with you because you always win." Uh!? duh!!!!
Sorry for the rant, but my answer stands even though she still borrows my make-up

.
NO she does not accept Virginia
Virginia

Hope · Post by **Hope** » Mon Jan 31, 2005 2:31 pm

My DW is very accepting. I'm not sure exactly why as I'm not that accpting of it myself most times....sigh. She believes it just is. Nothing either of us can really do about it. Too, she believes that were CDing not part of who I am, I wouldn't be the person I am.

I do understand it can be a bit of a burden for anyone, specially SO's who, having grown up doing what we CDers would love to do, just can't understand the desire. My hats off to those who accept. It certainly makes life more wonder filled instead of stress filled.

Now if I only knew why we do it....sigh

Hope

Claire D · Post by **Claire D** » Mon Jan 31, 2005 3:12 pm

My answer is accepting. Even though not 100 %. My wife knows about my crossdressing. And even to a small degree she is supportive, sometimes. And yes there is limits set. But she also knows that on the days that I do not have to be at work and she does. I dress as much as possible.

Hugs and Kisses, Claire

Jassmine(SO) · Post by **Jassmine(SO)** » Mon Jan 31, 2005 5:07 pm

Howdy Y'all

I voted accepting, as I have absolutely no problems with Ahzz's CDing

In fact, he is a much happier camper than he was when we first and before he told me. He was really thrilled that I had no problems with it and that I actually enjoy it. Does that acceptance ever waiver, nope. Ahzz is Ahzz and I accept for who he is, as he is. And he accepts me for who I am, as I am.

Hey Ahzz.....SHMILY

*Hugs & Love*

Gelinda · Post by **Gelinda** » Mon Jan 31, 2005 6:02 pm

Well She acts like she is accepting, so that is what I voted but I wonder if she will be when we get to live in the same house again. Gee.

Sally · Post by **Sally** » Mon Jan 31, 2005 8:26 pm

My wife is accepting of the person I am up to the point where if I completed my transition, then she freely says that she cannot know in her own mind if she could live with it all if I did, even though she says she would have tried her utmost to come to terms with it.

Why does she accept me as I am and what I do? Well, over the years we have spent countless hours talking about it all, right from the days when I thought it was mostly just all about the clothes, although she admits that she knew in her own heart that I had deeper issues than just the clothes. She says that part of her wedding vows which said, " In sickness in health, for richer or poorer, for better or worse, till death us do part" meant to her exactly what she said at that time and her love for me extends way beyond anything physical or superficial. She says it's a part of my personality and she accepts it as she does all my other good or not so good traits.

She often says, ' Where there is true love no hurdle is insurmountable."

Kind Regards.

Sally

Jadeanne · Post by **Jadeanne** » Mon Jan 31, 2005 10:55 pm

Hi all,

I voted YES, because it is true for me.

My desire re-emerged at age 51, 33 years after I last borrowed my mother's (only child) clothing. There were multiple things that combined to retrigger the urge.

Right at that time, we were invited to a civil ceremony from one of my wifes close GG relatives. We agonized over attending, and we talked about it, and my wife told me that her view was we should attend, and to accept her relative's choice, and we should all be accepting. I took that as an opening, and told her of my returning desires over the previous couple of weeks, and she accepted me.

That was 2 1/2 years ago, and Jadeanne doesn't venture out of the house dressed by mutual agreement. My wife supports me and we borrow from each other's wardrobes. She advises me on clothing and today for my birthday, one of my gifts was a pair of Avenue floral print satin panties. We buy each other femme gifts - I buy her a lot more things and look a lot more carefully through different eyes than pre-Jadeanne.

Did my essay pass the test?

Jadeanne

Beauty · Post by **Beauty** » Mon Jan 31, 2005 11:03 pm

Hi Love,

Great thread!

I voted accepting.

I'm dressed almost every day these days and the cyclical dressing interval (dressing) seems to get longer and the not dressing seems to be getting shorter.

She says I'm happier when I'm dressed, but I feel the same either way. Femme clothing is more comfy to me, but I don't feel it makes me feel any better.

Thanks Love!!!

Beauty

Karen Lyn(SO) · Post by **Karen Lyn(SO)** » Mon Jan 31, 2005 11:43 pm

I guess I accept it but I'm not sure I'll ever be entirely comfortable with it even though I knew about Andrea when we got together.

Amber(SO) · Post by **Amber(SO)** » Wed Feb 02, 2005 7:12 pm

I would have to say accepting because it is an integral part of Kyra. I don't think she would be the sensitive and loving person she is without that part of her personna. I am still in the early stages of getting "comfortable" with seeing her dressed, and I fear for her safety when going out dressed. (Too many he-man, gotta prove what a REAL man is like kind of people out there.)

I think the main problem for many SOs is just comprehending the "why" of it all, when we feel our CDers are so perfect as they are!

just my opinion...
Amber

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