Introducing Leslie Langford

[Leslie Langford]

Hello Ladies,

I have been a "lurker" here for almost a year now, and have finally decided to take the plunge and become a full-fledged member.

I am a heterosexual male in my mid-50's, and like so many of you in my age bracket, have finally come not only to fully accept my crossdressing, but also to recognize it for the gender "gift" that it actually is. And like most of you, this realization did not hit me completely until I began to explore the topic of crossdressing on the internet and realized what a diverse, vibrant and far-flung community we really are.

Futhermore, I now recognize that I am a perfectly "normal" crossdresser, and that all of the "weird", formerly unexplainable, and extremely strong attraction to female clothing and the female lifestyle that I first became aware of in my youth are shared by my crossdressing sisters, and that this is a place where we can discuss these needs within a supportive and non-judgemental environment.

I am married, have two grown children (a boy and a girl), and a wife who initially greeted the news of my crossdressing with fear and hostility (this goes back about 30 years), but has gradually become tolerant, if not yet fully accepting. The fact that we are now "empty-nesters", along with the virtual elimination of the fear that the children might accidentally discover my crossdressing activities has done much to increase her comfort level.

We have adopted the ever-popular (!) "don't ask, don't tell" policy for the time being, and so far it is working. While my wife has come to understand my needs (sort of!) with the help of some joint counselling several years ago, she has never met "Leslie", and has no desire to do so. At the same time, she no longer balks at giving me the occasional private "dress-up" time, knows that I have an extensive female wardrobe, and does not object to my periodic shopping sprees. She has also agreed to letting me have one of our spare closets for Leslie's clothes, as we both eventually got tired of the hide-and-seek routine with respect to hiding my female clothes.

Overall, I am in a good place mentally these days with my crossdressing, but it has been a long journey and a sometimes bumpy ride.

If there is one piece of advice that I could give to our younger sisters, it is not to deny who you are and let it become the proverbial "monkey on your back". You are far more fortunate than my generation in this respect, because the world has become a much more tolerant, accepting and non-judgemental place, and crossdressing no longer carries the stigma that it once did.

I also agree with those who counsel that a crossdresser should make his SO aware of his inclinations early on in the relationship to avoid a major surprise later on, and thereby give them a chance to back out if this exceeds their comfort zone. This is especially true for those crossdressers contemplating marriage. I was one of those naive ones who thought that this was just a phase that I was going through, and that marriage would "cure" me. After 34 years, I am still waiting for this cure to kick in (LOL!).

Sorry if I've rambled on a bit too long, but I really feel at home here, and I look forward to interacting with many of you ladies in the future as we continue to explore our "gender gift".

Love,

Leslie

[Rikki]

Leslie,
Your story sounds like mine except that I haven't yet told my wife. This is a great forum with nice people and lots of good talk.
Rikki

[DonnaT]

Welcome aboard Leslie.

I can understand the change in your wife's attitude with respect to the empty nest. Seems my wife has become a lot more peaceful with my CDing around the house after I told our son (he still lives at home and said he already knew). Haven't said anything to our daughter yet, as she doesn't live at home.

[Anita]

[quote="Leslie Langford"]. I was one of those naive ones who thought that this was just a phase that I was going through, and that marriage would "cure" me. After 34 years, I am still waiting for this cure to kick in (LOL!).

Hi Leslie--
I'm glad you decided to "unlurk" and join up with us. I like your writing.

There have been some girlfriends in my life that I really, really pursued. I felt like I needed to win them over, no matter what it took. Could I have been honest with them? It would have been hard to do, knowing that I stood a good chance of losing them before I began. That is not easy to think about. My crossdressing was not an issue when I was younger, so I didn't have to make that particular confession.

It's good that you and your wife have some sort of understanding.

[Jamie Ann]

Hi Leslie,

      I noticed on another forum that you had written to a number of large department stores, shoes stores, etc., identifying yourself as a male who enjoys wearing women’s clothing, and then asking them what their corporate policies were on men shopping for women’s attire for themselves and using the fitting rooms. When you have gotten responses from most of these businesses, I hope you will give us an update! That would be especially interesting information to many of the girls here.

      Glad to have you here!

[Elinor]

Leslie
Your first post was most lucid
I look forward to reading more distinct posts.
Glad to you found us.
I'm glad that you are secure in your feminine side and looking forward to hearing more form another girlfriend.
Yes thank goodness for the internet and to find we are not the only Janegirls in the world.


Keep on Skirting!

As if you could ever stop.